Not our Goodness
Key VersesSo He said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. But if you want to enter into life, keep the commandments.” (Matthew 19:17)
But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you. Therefore, brethren, we are debtors—not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. (Romans 8:9-14)
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Bob and I were married in the middle of World War II. After a short honeymoon we began a year-and-a-half-long “paper marriage” while Bob returned to war in the Pacific.
I wrote often and passionately of my love. Then Bob came home and I had to begin living out what I had sincerely, but naively, portrayed in my letters. Bob quickly got to know the selfish, immature, not-so-good wife who had never shown up in our wartime correspondence.
As my hopes of appearing good faded, my longing to be good grew. Bibles verses haunted me. For example: Proverbs 31:12. “She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” The other verse that caught my attention was in Matthew 19, where Jesus asks, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God…” (v.17).
During the years we were neck-deep in raising four children, Bob and I were struggling in our relationship. We were disappointed – in ourselves, and in each other. A study of Romans began to reveal the fact that God’s Spirit lived in us. In all our years as Christians, neither of us had heard a message on the Spirit of God! We hadn’t realized that God wanted to express His goodness in and through us.
We began to lean on the in-dwelling God to change us, and our marriage was transformed. The understanding that we could live out of God’s resources changed the dynamics of how we related to each other. Now we both want to demonstrate the loveliness of Jesus in our lives, and we know he will help us do that.
To Ponder….
What makes it impossible for spouses always to “look good” to one another?
How can you come together in depending on God to bring “goodness” into your relationship?
Enjoy the Movie clip - Love (1 Cor 13)
http://www.dayspring.com/movies/view.asp?moviename=loveverses.swf
Not forgetting to love our Lord Jesus Christ.
"Therefore know that the LORD your God, He is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and mercy for a thousand generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments;"Deu 7:9
Why we need the Word of GOD!!
The Word was GOD
John 1:1
In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
Made you WISE for SALVATION
2Tim 3:14-17
But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing
from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to
make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.
BREAD OF LIFEJohn 6:48
I am the bread of life.
I was sharing with Bro Kian Heng that we have to FULLY depend and trust our Lord Jesus Christ for strength, mercy and loving kindness if we are seriously taking up the roles of taking care of the married couple (be it newly, after married for many years, or even those who are getting married this year), cause the evil ones will attack our Bro family first. Somehow, the evil ones will want to distract us by using all ways for us loose heart in this "IMPORTANT" service. Lord Jesus Christ! YOU MUST help us and save us! And one of the weapon that we have to keep close to us is:
The SWORD of the SPIRITEph 6:17b
and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God;
So i thank God that HE see so much further than we see, i believe Bro Kian Heng do not know that our Lord has the purpose to have someone to pass this "devotional bible" for his marriage 10 years ago was also for this purpose. Not only for his marriage, but also for other marriages of the saints. To help, edify, strengthen, prayer etc..... for all the saints. Lord! Praise YOU and Adore YOU!.
GLORY BE TO HIS NAME
Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
My wife and I received the “Couples’ Devotional Bible” as a wedding gift from a beloved brother. That was 10 years ago. It is the best gift ever because of the ever living Word of God.
Over the next few months, I hope to share excerpts from the devotional bible which I've found to be encouraging and helpful. The following is the first of the series.
It is the prayer of brother Kok Yong and mine that our marriages be further strengthened by the Word of God, bringing glory to our Lord.
Love in Christ,
kh
Break the Cycle
Key Passage: Genesis 45: 1-15
Then Joseph could not restrain himself before all those who stood by him, and he cried out, “Make everyone go out from me!” So no one stood with him while Joseph made himself known to his brothers. And he wept aloud, and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard it.Then Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph; does my father still live?” But his brothers could not answer him, for they were dismayed in his presence. And Joseph said to his brothers, “Please come near to me.” So they came near. Then he said: “I am Joseph your brother, whom you sold into Egypt. But now, do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves because you sold me here; for God sent me before you to preserve life. For these two years the famine has been in the land, and there are still five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvesting. And God sent me before you to preserve a posterity for you in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So now it was not you who sent me here, but God; and He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt. “Hurry and go up to my father, and say to him, ‘Thus says your son Joseph: “God has made me lord of all Egypt; come down to me, do not tarry. You shall dwell in the land of Goshen, and you shall be near to me, you and your children, your children’s children, your flocks and your herds, and all that you have. There I will provide for you, lest you and your household, and all that you have, come to poverty; for there are still five years of famine.”’ “And behold, your eyes and the eyes of my brother Benjamin see that it is my mouth that speaks to you. So you shall tell my father of all my glory in Egypt, and of all that you have seen; and you shall hurry and bring my father down here.” Then he fell on his brother Benjamin’s neck and wept, and Benjamin wept on his neck. Moreover he kissed all his brothers and wept over them, and after that his brothers talked with him.
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We are told in Genesis that “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife.” Yet if they come out of an unhealthy family background, that is, an upbringing that may have included alcoholism, verbal abuse or other chronic problems, they will have a hard time following this biblical mandate.
My dad was an alcoholic, and my parents were divorced. I never met my father until I was in high school, and then I hated him for many years after that. When I became a Christian, I knew it wasn’t right to feel this way, so I buried my hatred. But when I got married, the strong negative feelings were still there, and they started to surface and poison my relationship with my wife. It wasn’t until she confronted me about the way I was treating her that I began to work through the real issue – my unresolved anger toward my dad.
I harbored a lot of hatred toward my dad, but in resolving those feelings, I learned for a real lesson in forgiveness, and that in itself has been a priceless gift. It broke the unhealthy cycle and opened the way to begin a healthy cycle of family relationships.
(Author: John Trent)
Marriage builders
How has forgiveness been constructive in your marriage?
What issues in your relationship might be resolved through forgiveness?
3 second and a lifetime.
"It takes 3 seconds to say "I love you".
3 hours to explain it and,
A lifetime to prove it."
Power of Touch and Give
"Men need to get their ego stroked to know they are loved. Women need expression/assurance of love to know they are loved."
Agreed?
Just by stroking on our ego, we will know that we are loved, just by providing expression/assurance of love, they will know that they are love. Is this "the ONLY" essence to the success of marriage?
Stroking by the wife +
Provision of expression/assurance of Love =
LOVENot sure? do not think so? pls do not judge so early. In order for us to agreed or disagreed with the above formula, you have to try it.
Give a thought, wives, how to "stroke" your husband ego? how to provide the expression/assurance of LOVE to your wife, husband?
For WifeDefinition of
"stroke" (by New Collin Dictionary) : to touch, brush, or caress lightly or gently.
My experience : I fully agreed. Men need the
touch of Love (do not estimate the Power of Touch, sister), look at our Lord Jesus on earth, He himself is the "Touch of Love". He has touch the eye of sinner that they may see, many were saved by His touch.
For HusbandDefinition of "
expression"
(by New Collin Dictionary) : the act or an instance of transforming ideas into words.
Do not tell your wife : "already husband and wife, still need to say "i love you", so old fashion....." Brothers, you have to tell your wife "verbally, soft and clear: I Love You". Hopefully it's not just one a year during your wedding anniversary.
Definition of "
assurance"
(by New Collin Dictionary) : a promise or pledge of support; freedom from doubt; certainty.
That is why communication comes into pictures," doubt" comes when there is lack of communication and often we replaced it with "Presumptuous". Result : Argument due to misunderstanding, isn't that our experience most of the times? Just like the Assurance of Salvation, once we are saved, WE ARE SAVED! of course our Lord has paid the price for His church, HIS LIVES. Likewise, we, husband not only we have to assure our wife our marriage vow before God and before men, we also have to give ourselves to our wife in order to win her confidence and trust.
May our Good Lord Jesus blessed all His children.
Love the heart!!
Love the heart that hurts you,
but
never hurt the heart that loves you.
Biblical Success in Marriage
Biblical Success comes when you….
1. let your fear of God determine your attitude toward your spouse
2. understand and celebrate the roles of a man and woman in marriage
3. follow through on your responsibilities
4. stay committed to your marriage no matter what
5. treat your spouse with courtesy and esteem, experience Level 3 communication, spend time together, deal with conflict, trust one another and create romance.
Prayer for True SuccessFather, we want to do marriage right. We know that this is very close to Your heart. We know that marriage is a precious gift, so help us treat it with honour and respect every day. Help us to love our spouses with a sacrificial love that honours You. Though we fail, You give grace. Allow us to take and turn it to you in our marriages for Your glory. We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Courtesy begin at home.
Create Romance? create
COURTESY first. This is something most of couple lost gradually in their love life. Why? we have taken one another for granted. In fact, we treat our colleague, friend, much more better than our spouse. The way we talk, the way we conduct ourselves is totally different.
We have to treat our spouse as how we treat our friend and colleague, we have to learn to be courteous to one another, do not think that : "Aiyah, not problem, afterall we are husband and wife, she is ok, would not get angry.......", if you fall under this category, pls apologized to your love one, because you have already hurt your spouse even without knowing it.
That is the reason why we find it easier to share our problems with our close friend than our spouse, because many a times when you want to share sometime to your spouse, your spouse may reply : "i busy now, can't you see what i am doing, you have no eye to see what i am doing.............." instead of : "I am so sorry, dear, can you give me a second, let me settle this, and i will get back to you, k?"
Husband and wife is so close that they became "ONE", which also mean that they are even closer than friend. So, please be courteous to one another. Be wise in your speech, your spouse are your best friend and best colleague. Treat them well.
Godly Success in Marriage - Part 10
Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
The following concludes our sharing from chapter 10 of Tommy Nelson's "The 12 Essentials of Godly Success". Keep a look-out for our next series!
Action 7: Create RomanceI’ve never met a man who married a woman because he looked at her and said, “Now, that woman can keep a house.” No woman said,” That’s the mechanic I’ve prayed for all my life.”…You looked into her eyes, and she melted your heart. At some point, you leaned over to her and said those words,” I love you.” And it went so deeply into her heart that you wanted to get married right there. It felt so good to let somebody in so completely to your heart. That’s why you got married.
But you did it then as an instinct.
You have to do it now was a discipline. By that I mean you have to be affectionate with your mate. Husbands, touch your wife affectionately, not in a sexual way but to show her you care. Wives, you don’t have to wear the nightgown that was handed down from your mother and her mother before her. It’s a great poncho, but you can buy something else. It means that you can sit on your husband’s lap and
look into his eyes and tell him “thank you.”My wife has a custom. I don’t know where she got it, but I say “hallelujah.” When a man’s been out of the house for a while and then comes home, she thinks he needs at least a ten-second kiss from his wife. That’s a marvelous custom that we have. I guarantee that will put some steam in your stride when you come through the door.
We need affection from our spouses.
Husband, do you tell your wife that you love her? Tell her you love her, show her affection…
Husbands also need to realise that acts of service are romantic…Put the dishes in the dishwasher. Straighten up things around the house. Help your wife put the kids to bed. Do acts of service.
SummaryBiblical Success comes when you….
1. let your fear of God determine your attitude toward your spouse
2. understand and celebrate the roles of a man and woman in marriage
3. follow through on your responsibilities
4. stay committed to your marriage no matter what
5. treat your spouse with courtesy and esteem, experience Level 3 communication, spend time together, deal with conflict, trust one another and create romance.
Prayer for True SuccessFather, we want to do marriage right. We know that this is very close to Your heart. We know that marriage is a precious gift, so help us treat it with honour and respect every day. Help us to love our spouses with a sacrificial love that honours You. Though we fail, You give grace. Allow us to take and turn it to you in our marriages for Your glory. We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
I made my mother-in-law happy.
It is a story of 5-6pcs of Large Pork-Chop.
Last Sat evening, after the young people co-ordination, i went to pick my family in my in-law house at around 10pm. Upon seeing me, knowing that i love her "Pork Chop", she asked me if i had my dinner, i replied : "Yes". But seeing her keeping the "Pork Chop" and a bowl of rice, i changed my mind and i told her : Ok, i will have my dinner again, and yes, u guess it all right, I "FINISHED" the Pork Chop and you can see her smiling face.
That is one of the ways that you can pleased your mother-in-laws. Of course, it sound funny, but it is life, every mother love to be praised in their cooking. Don't you agreed?
But of course, we are still praying for her salvation. And this will be the greatest joy that we can give her.
Finally!!!!!! We prayed together as a family.
Dear children,
Remember 29th Dec 2006. This is the day that our Lord finally answered Papa and Mummy prayer. That is to pray together as a family.
That evening, the Lord Jesus just opened the way, and we have a wonderful prayer together. And if you will see this email in years to come........................... Remember and remember: You have to bring your own family to God in prayer.
Love,
papa and mummy.
